Well, not at the same time at least!
These past few days have been a serious challenge in accepting my own truth…
One that was shared by my 6 year old daughter at 2am in the bathroom of a hotel where we stayed.
She woke up coughing and feeling nauseous, so I went with her to the bathroom to help her calm down.
I could see she was struggling with anxiety, because she had trouble breathing.
In the past, that would’ve freaked me out completely and get me anxious as well, but over the years I’ve learned how to deal with that rising anxiety. And so I knew I had to sit down with her to help her express whatever was stuck inside.
I started talking with her and asking some questions, so that she started to feel more comfortable to share what was going on. It first seemed to evolve around things at school, but then after a little while she said:
”Mama, you work too much!l
And I replied: “Yes I know sweetie, but I’m helping other people”
And then she said something that really shook me: “but papa and I also need your help…”
“That’s true my love….”, was the only thing I could answer while I was just processing what she had shared.
I knew deep down she was right…
I knew I had to change something for the wellbeing of my family…
But it’s been a struggle to really accept what that means in my day-to-day life the past few days.
I’m a person with a big heart who always has endless ideas to help other people, but I guess now it’s time to take care of myself and take a break for a while.
My biggest dream was to write my own book and to create my own app, which I’ve been able to do over the past 5 years together with the help and support of my husband.
And now it’s time to turn the tables…
My husband now needs my support with his dreams and I’m so proud of the things he’s been creating as well, that I’m more than happy to help wherever I can.
This does mean that I have to drop some of my current projects and postpone them until further notice:
• The Offline Experience in Amsterdam
• The Offline Conversations for the Esther Ibiza Club
I’ll reach out to all of you who’ve already signed up for that, so that we can find a solution that suits both of us.
It’s time for a break…
Lots of love,
Esther