The reason I've been traveling for so many years in my life when I was single, but also after I got married and started my own little family, was fear...
Fear of discovering things about myself
Fear of not being able to handle all those new insights into who I truly am
Fear of sharing this new version of me
Fear of just being me all the time
When I travel there's always this sense of discomfort, because you need to find your bearings every time you get to a new place and meet new people. It takes a lot of energy to set up your life every time, which helps you distract from your fears and at the same time it helps you build the resilience you need to stay true to what you believe in.
Meeting new people and discovering new places became a lifestyle to me that helped me develop my skills in connecting with anyone. The issues that I would run into in those new cities or countries would always give me a great start to connect with the new people I met, because I simply shared my challenges that I was facing in those moments. This is where I learnt that being vulnerable and showing your struggle is actually the best way to get a deeper connection with the other person.
There's so much strength that comes from accepting the fact that you have issues in your life, that my wish would be for more people to start to acknowledge this. There's no shame or judgement necessary, because we all deal with (minor) issues on a daily base. We should focus on those things that we have in common, instead of focusing on what separates us.
I totally get it that it feels very scary the first time to share your own challenges with someone before even working through them, because we're all trained in this society to focus on our successes instead of our "failures". But believe me when I say that it's way more healing to share your challenges while you're working through them. Those fears of letting your guard down are totally normal and something we all go through when facing our issues.
The difference however that you can experience in your life when you decide to express your issues with someone else, is the first step into healing yourself. To me it felt very awkward the first time to share my fear, work through it and experience the relief afterwards. This was so powerful and decisive in my way of going about things nowadays, that I absolutely can say it was life changing!
For me personally it was a huge help into healing my issues with anxiety that I've had for many years and didn't seem to get rid of even after trying so many different therapies, methods and techniques. Releasing my fear by expressing it to someone else, became my fuel for dealing with my issues in life. One thing I would remind you though, before you start facing your fears: be aware that there really is no way to do it smoothly, or do it somewhat gradually to get past it. You just need to feel the fear and then start going through it anyway. Don't let it stop you from doing what is best for you!
Sure, it is super uncomfortable and very challenging the first time you decide to share and express what's really going on with you, but let me tell you the benefits from doing it though:
- you get to build resilience
- you finally start to feel more alive
- you suddenly understand how magical this self belief is
- all you want to accomplish in life suddenly comes closer
- any distraction that comes your way, now seems to be an opportunity to show your faith in your own actions
So whenever you feel there is an opportunity to do something that you've been dreaming of for a very long time, just go for it! Really, what is the worst thing that can happen?
There's so much wonderful and amazing stuff out there where you didn't dare to go before, so why not give it a try? Take a chance on yourself!
Whatever this is for you, is something only you know best, so I hope that you are excited to discover what seems to be waiting for you on the other end of your fears!